He would often leave his job early to travel about 45 minutes across the city to come help me out. Holiday grief – 10 tips for coping during emotional times.Wes did whatever he could to be there for them, and for me. I couldn’t afford the daycare and was left with very few other options for my children. As a newly single mom, I was trying to get my life back together and working ridiculously long hours at work. I never thought that him helping me with my children would start a ten-year relationship and teach me some of life’s most amazing lessons. “I don’t think there's one word that I could use to describe how painful it was for me to lose my best friend, or how painful it still is for me to continue on in life without him.” He would always thank me for letting him be apart of their lives and I would always thank him for being apart of mine. And when he was with my children, his eyes would also light up. His eyes would light up so brightly whenever he spoke about her. He always had photos of her and would take them out for us to see. He would speak of Channel constantly, not just to me, but also told my children about her. He didn’t want my kids to feel how Channel felt, and even though he wasn’t their father, he played a big role in their lives.Ĭoping with the suicide of a friend: “Wes became my best friend” I knew how much he loved Channel, and not being apart of her life broke him inside. He said he would want someone helping with his daughter, too. He contacted me right away to let me know he would help me out with my kids however he could. It wasn’t until my partner and I split and I moved out West, that Wes and I started speaking on a regular basis. We never really spoke much, but I knew he was really liked and got along with everyone. I met Wes years ago we had the same group of friends for years. He was the only person that I never questioned if his love for me was real. I’m sure on many levels we probably had a pretty toxic relationship, and even I’ll admit, we usually got up to quite a lot of shenanigans, some that were probably quite questionable, but he was my everything. It didn’t matter the distance between us, the years that past, the people between us Wes was my Big, and I was his Little. Everyone knew how much we loved one another and just how much he meant to me. We had everything planned out, we had our whole lives ahead of us. I don’t think there's one word that I could use to describe how painful it was for me to lose my best friend, or how painful it still is for me to continue on in life without him. “How do you cope when a friend commits suicide? What happens to the people left behind, grieving their loss?” All I can ever hope for is that you finally found that inner peace. Wesley Michael Clarke, the man that no one really knew his age until he passed away, the father that loved his daughter more than life itself, the friend that made everyone laugh even if he hurt inside, and the life that was taken way too soon. It’s not everyday that someone like this walks into your life, and in the blink of an eye, is taken. It would never do justice to the man that would literally give the shirt off his back for someone he didn’t know. but none of it will ever actually convey just what an amazing human being he was and the lives that he touched. I could talk about him all day long, laugh about the stupid things we would do and say. I could go on about what an amazing person he was, how much he loved everyone, the fight he put up for his daughter, or how everyone adored him. There are so many things I could write about Wes. In many ways, I can answer most of those questions from my own attempted suicide, but grieving his loss is something I struggle with daily. These are all questions that have run through my head time and time again. Why do people commit suicide? What drives someone to end their own life? What goes through their mind, their heart, their being, when they make that decision? What happens to the people left behind, grieving their loss? And how do you cope when a friend commits suicide? How can you deal with that? Now feeling happier and stronger, this is her story of hope. Trying to make sense of why he took his own life has been a long and painful struggle. When Anastasia Fox's best friend, Wes, committed suicide, her world fell apart.
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